Tag: kindness

A Cross to Bear

by James, posted in Stuggles, Victories

I hate social media, but believe it is a necessary evil in today’s world. This is especially true for an author. There are times when it serves a purpose. For me, it is often the reminder of memories shared in the past. Last week I was reminded of a quote stumbled on while doing a research paper for school. It struck a cord with me, just as it did several years ago.


“Christianity has always insisted that the cross we bare proceeds the crown we wear. To be a Christian, one must take up his cross, with all of its difficulties and agonizing and tragedy-packed content, and carry it until that very cross leaves its marks upon us and redeems to that more excellent way which comes only through suffering” – Martin Luther King Jr

The reality is we are not promised a life of ease, or one free of suffering. Many of you reading this know this all too well. The struggles of life as a parent of a special needs child is often full of struggles. We all face a choice when life happens and we are faced with the unthinkable. When the suffering and trials come, do we rejoice as being counted worthy or do we get angry with God?

Trust me, rejoicing in the hospital or funeral home is not easy. In fact, it is absolutely impossible when we try to do it on our own. There are days where there is no joy at all. But God is good to remind me that He is still faithful even when the pressures of life seem to be too much to bear.

On the other hand, what do we do when life is going our way and everything seems good? Are we quick to shy away from those who are suffering?

After the Roman soldiers beat and mocked Jesus, He was led away to be crucified. The literal cross He bore was too much for the human beaten human body to carry to the crucifixion site, so they forced a man named Simon to carry the cross for Jesus. I doubt at the time Simon understood the significance of this task. He simply did it because he had no choice.

The cross many of us bear is a heavy burden. It often becomes more than we can manage. Many of us are longing for a Simon to carry it for a little while. So, what do we do when the Holy Spirit prompts us to carry another person’s cross? Do we jump in and shoulder the burden, or do we look away?

It is not easy to take on someone else’s burden, especially when we have our own to carry. For a Christian, we have no option. Jesus took the ultimate burden off our shoulders, taking the cross that was too heavy for us to bear on His shoulders. To bear someone else’s cross for a few hours is a small price to pay.

One day we will be able to trade this cross for a crown.

January ramblings

by James, posted in Uncategorized

So, I’m a little behind with this month’s blog post. I struggled with a bit of writers block. I guess it comes from spending a lot of time in final book things. I had a couple topics, but they require a little more brain power than I could muster!

Some of the block was because January was another rough month in our house. For me, it started our with making my fourth trip from Colorado to southern Iowa in as many months. It was also the second funeral I have officiated in four months. Then we all got sick. We did not get tested, but from the symptoms I am sure we had Covid. I am not sure if we got it from Ben’s class or if I brought it back from Iowa.

The biggest disappointment from this month was canceling Daniel’s VNS surgery. The week we were all sick was the week the surgery was scheduled. The reality is we are not alone. The nurse made it sound like they cancel as many surgery’s as they actually complete right now.

This was the third time we had to cancel the surgery. Two were because Daniel was sick. The second time was different. He was exposed to a Covid positive child two hours into the school day after thanksgiving.

This has been on my mind a lot lately. A special needs classroom often has students with compromised immune systems. Yet it was another special needs parent who sent their child to school before their Covid test results came back.

Now I know their are extenuating circumstances. I doubt these parents meant any harm. To me, it is more indicative of the state our country is in. We have lost the ability, as a whole, to care about others. The idea of putting others first is foreign to many, even in the church. Covid has brought it to light in a major way. Personal rights, wants and desires have taken place of caring enough for others to put them first.

It’s sad that so many have lost the ability to think of others. For families like mine, who already fight for our kids, this is one more dangerous hurdle to overcome.

I have a challenge for February. I challenge all my readers to take this month to be conscious about how we really love others. Not just our family, but the people we encounter every day. How do you treat the cashier at the grocery store? The waitress? Our coworkers?

When our time on earth is done and the Lord calls us home, what will people say? Will they praise you with stories about how you lived and loved? Or will they struggle to find anything nice to say?

We are in control of the legacy we leave. So what kind of legacy are you building?

The Kindness of a Stranger

by James, posted in Victories

Christmas time means shopping, and shopping means lots and lots of people. This year we have done less online and more in stores, with Super D in tow. With all the people, this can be challenging to say the least. Often the wheelchair will not fit down crowded isles, and if it does, the hands and feet never stop moving. People tend to get cranky when he pulls their carts sideways as they go by.

Our last big shopping trip went about the same. We set out with Super D and Baby B to pick up a couple last minute items. What should have been a three hour trip ended up being close to five. Days like that are hard on the little ones, especially Daniel.

After the second stop, we slipped into Chick-Fil-A for lunch. Super D was struggling by then. Lunch was our normal outing event, with seizure activity followed by hyperactivity. Throw in a little throwing of food and some attempting to bolt and you have a normal restaurant experience for our family.

I normally watch people, this day was no different. However, it was different in the fact that no one was paying attention to Super D. Or at least I thought no one was.

As we were finishing up, a young lady in her 20’s appeared at our table. She had been sitting close by. To my surprise, she must have been watching us. She stopped to tell me one thing.

“Your doing a good job.”

By that time I was getting frustrated. God knew what I needed and sent this stranger to tell me.

Now, a lot of people tell me things like this. For it to come from a complete stranger is something entirely different.

I do not know who the young woman was. She will never know how much the simple comment meant to me. In a world filled with so much anger and hate, five simple words can make a huge difference.

Next time you see a family struggling with a special needs child, give in to the urge to encourage them. A simple word of kindness can mean so much to a stranger.

Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. – Philippians 4:5